The Time Has Come

The plight of bullied victims is only part of the issue. Equally cruel and devastating to the individual is the fact that school administrators across the board sweep complaints under the rug. Every school has children who are bullied. Every school has parents of these victims reporting the incidents to school administrators. Every school has the same officials claim to investigate the incidents, yet instantly take the word of the offenders OVER the word of the victims.

Why do we see this time after time? One reason is that the offenders are usually elites such as the jocks and the upper-middle class students. The victims are usually misfits, non-athletic, goth, individualistic, burnout, self-conscious, or anti-authoritarian. Faculty members who are prone to ignore cries for help may even favor the fact that elitist bullies may be pushing “undesirables” out of the school.

I have to home school my daughter. Students and teachers bullied her so viciously that she refused to attend. Our demands for investigations fizzled into nothing. The vice-principal declared to do an investigation. His results were to ask the offenders if they bullied my daughter and then take their denial at face value. The school followed up by taking a CHINS out on my daughter rather than address the issue. I have spoken to other students at that school who are being bullied. One child had issues with the same teacher as my daughter: a teacher who the vice-principal defended when we complained.

An ex-boyfriend’s family members were bullying my other daughter at the high school. Without our consent or knowledge she was pulled into a room with the offenders and forced to sign a contract that protected THEM from HER. I called the school and they claimed that my daughter was bullying her tormentors. We involved the police and insisted that the male bully not be in any of my daughter’s classes. The school did not comply with our pleas. She begged me to let her drop out. I found her a night school to attend. Today we registered her for classes in a trade school.

In Rockland, the elementary school had an abusive teacher who reduced some students to tears. He called an over-weight girl fat to her face in front of other students. I complained and was given a run around by the exiting superintendent and then his replacement. The new superintendent was quoted in a local paper as stating that Rockland has a zero tolerance policy on bullying. I beg to differ.

For years I have dealt with school officials who refuse to help students who are being bullied. My own children are fiercely independent. They are goth so they dye their hair different colors and dress in remarkable outfits. They listen to Rob Zombie, Korn, and Black Veil Brides. My older children have piercings and tattoos. The apple does not fall far from the tree. I dye my hair blue and gage my ears often. Yet, these are not reasons for school officials to immediately target my children as they have. I encourage them to express their individuality fearlessly. If they were girlie-girls, I would support that as well. Who ever they are as a person is their gift to the world. Shame on the people who insist on destroying the self-esteem of any child. Is conformity more important than the rights of an individual? Of course it is not.

Although my children no longer attend public school, my blood is boiling at the way faculties are reacting to this issue. The Bridgewater student who was beaten by three jocks while another student filmed it was being bullied for over a year. The school officials did nothing until his mother got a lawyer and the video leaked onto the Internet. THIS IS THE CRUX OF THE ISSUE!

The local papers continue to call the perpetrators on video “allegedly responsible for the bullying.” There is visual evidence of a student being beaten by three jocks. Where does the term allegedly enter in to this? Shame on the news media outlets for proposing any sympathy towards the bullies. They are nothing more than thugs. They did it. We saw it. In a court of law, the evidence would speak for itself. The time has come for parents to act.

Scholastic athletic programs are important for schools. They teach principles like teamwork, goal setting, and exercise. They also instill a pack mentality. Jocks are programmed to attack things that are different (uniforms). They are instructed to strike weaknesses (and weaklings) and to do so as a team. Ganging up on weaker kids is not a new phenomenon. It is a consequence of their training. Add to that the lionization of these elite students. They are favored while their victims are often scorned.

We must band together and demand that bullying is not only addressed, but that the schools will be safe environments for ALL children. We must instill tolerance classes. By teaching students about our similarities as people we can counter-balance the indoctrination of scholastic athletics. Adults at the schools must ensure zero tolerance of bullying. Perhaps more parents can volunteer to patrol the hallways. Alternately, schools could hire more faculty members and train them properly to help children in crisis. We should involve parents of students not on an athletic team to police the instruction by coaches. A system of checks and balances must be infused into the curriculum that allows inclusion of non-elite students and parents. Many of us are disenfranchised because the elites maintain the corrupt practices.

Finally, we must heed the lessons of Columbine and Marshfield. Victims of bullying develop many psychological issues that range from low self-esteem to violent outbursts. These can develop quickly or gradually over time. The effects are lasting and the consequences include eating disorders, drug abuse and even suicide. We can agree that the stakes are high. People’s lives and well being are at stake. Should we continue to turn a blind eye? Should we allow school officials to avoid doing their jobs and fostering criminal behavior while simultaneously punishing the victims? Should we continue to lionize athletes and forgive their violent tendencies?

The answer is no. The time to act is now.